Sunday, May 3, 2015

Spin, Spin, Spin

Not sure if you've seen Age of Ultron yet. If not, no worries, this post contains no spoilers.

I want to say, though, that the critics nailed this movie: while entertaining, Age of Ultron breaks no new ground, carries on too many plot-lines, and forces some pointless characterization on certain actors.

Does this mean I hated the movie?


I LOVED it! There are few movies out there showcasing a wide range of super-heroes taking on villainous horrors. I even said "while entertaining" in my first post. Did you catch that?

while entertaining, Age of Ultron breaks no new ground...
 That's what I posted on my Facebook. My Sister-in-Law saw this status, and told my Wife "ADBG didn't like Avengers."

F'in hell?

Unrelated, my friend (henceforth "the Architect") has been dating a new girl. His sister, best friends with my Wife, pressed me for details. I don't know a damn thing about her.

His sister said, "All I know is that she likes bland food. Who says that? Who says 'I like bland food'?"

The Architect and I watched the new Avengers flick together. So, I asked him about that.

"Nope," Architect says, "she never said that."

The Architect likes to cook, a lot like me. For the first date, he invited the new girl to his condo, and prepared some slightly spicy tacos. She forced the food down her throat, but then told him she has quite picky tastes, but "as long as it's beige," she'll eat it.

So, she'll eat macaroni and cheese. Or spaghetti and meatballs. So, nothing out of the ordinary. Didn't Olive Garden build an entire damn franchise on inoffensive food that neither offends nor excites anyone?

Spin, spin, spin!

That's what I told my Wife this weekend. This all comes across as spin. I like exactness of language. I do not like impercise language because it leads to incorrect conclusions, like "ADBG doesn't like Avengers," or "the Architect's new girlfriend only likes bland food."

I don't like dealing with Spinners because, to get at the REAL information, I have to stop their rotating ball of truthiness and align their words with True North. Trying to ask these people for advice is like playing a child's game of telephone.

This irritates the crap out of me. Could you imagine talking to your doctor, and your doctor saying "There's nothing wrong with you," when what he really means is "you won't die today, but if you don't get to the hospital in the next 2 days your heart will explode you."

What I meant is that there's nothing immediately wrong with you....right now! By the way, I love you, but I'm not IN love with you. Does that make sense?

Certain men, like those on the Manosphere, eat a lot of flack for reading things literally. As in, assuming A is A. Most women enjoy wordplay, NOT saying exactly what they mean, and "beating around the bush."

We're expected to adjust. Because we're Men. Duh. Men HAVE to adjust to women all the time, don't you get that by now?!

Honestly, on an individual level, I don't care enough to raise a social stink about it. The personal is NOT the political. I certainly feel like this Rule Of INTJ applies here:

Statements you can't back up with either solid facts or solid reasoning will at best be ignored and at worst poked fun at in ways not many people would describe as nice.
 With my Wife, I tolerate certain levels of....uhhh...inanity.

A larger problem emerges when society collectively offers advice to people based on heavy Spin.

"Ashley only likes bland food," says Cindy, Ashley's best friend.

Two years:

"Why did you never make me lobster," Ashley screams. She hurls a plate at you, the wind whisks by your head and the fine china shatters into a million pieces. "I love lobster!"

You go back to Cindy.

"I have 17 stitches because you told me she only likes bland food."

"Well, that, AND lobster."


"Ashley likes guys who feel real natural," Cindy says.

You go up, throw down your Magic: The Gathering cards.

Ashley throws a drink in your face.

Cindy laughs.

"Girls don't like card games! You're such a dork!"

This sucks for guys. Imagine the following scenario:

When society speaks at large, they often speak with a LOT of context behind their words, stuff that they just understand naturally. Young guys, particularly those without a lot of social experience, apply "advice" from the Spinners without knowing this context, like poor INTJ above.

Chaos ensues.

Spinners are dangerous folk.

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